I have known my friend Mz. Bailey for over eight years and I have always admired and respected her as a mother. I am happy that she has agreed to write a few articles for my blog. This is the first in a two part article on parenting and culture.
Your comments are welcome.
Thank you gurl xoxo.
Balancing Motherhood While Preserving the Jamaican Culture- Part I
By T.D. Bailey
On May 19, 1998, my little girl Tifani graced us with her presence on this earth. She was 7lbs and measured 19 1/4 inches. She was a beautiful and looked like a Porcelain doll. I was overjoyed and the moment she turned 8-months old, I planned our first trip to my homeland-Jamaica. I recall telling my family we were coming down and was getting all the items I needed packed. I thought, 'ok, I will bring her formula, juices anda few snacks.' As I journeyed to Miami International I will filled with excitement and anxiousness. Tifani was so happy, it was as if she knew she was about to embark onan exciting journey.
As I stood in line at the Air Jamaica Airline ticket counter, I saw a mother with a child seemingly of Tifani's age. This mother had at least three carry-ons, two were baby bags- and one was a stroller. The baby bags were filled with 'sippy' cups and pacifiers and the like tucked inevery pocket of the bag. She also had checked luggagefilled with food, snacks, drinks, water, canned goods, etc. I thought, "Oh my, I think I under packed" because all I had was a baby bag. In it held her formula and clothes, a few Gerber bottle and some juice boxes. I overheard onemother telling her friend "my baby is so picky, she don't like eating any and everything". I became even more worried. I thought, 'suppose my daughter doesn't like all the things she will encounter in Jamaica? Am I being a bad mother for not bringing the entire grocery store?'
Quickly those thoughts were dismissed when I exited the airport in Montego Bay, to be greeted by a van filled with many of my family members from St. Elizabeth. The excitement rivaled my return to Jamaica in 1993 as I had migrated to the US in 1987. My daughter was immediately snatched from me, greeted with kisses and hugs and talk of "lawd she su pretty!" "a mi she fava!", of course my daughter did not fuss, she loved the attention.On our way from the airport we stopped and got jerk chicken. I remembered seeing how Tifani reached for the jerk chicken leg, and I thought "no baby it too spicy", my sister in law, took a piece of the chicken and rubbed it at the corner of her mouth and I thought, 'what is she doing?' so I asked. She stated that this is the way to get her familiar with the food. I thought ok. After Tifani devoured the entire jerk chicken leg, she held on so tight to the bone she fell asleep with it in her hand on the ride home. It was the cutest sight to see.
As our trip progressed, the "mouth corna sampling", as I call it, was done to everything she ate –i.e. cheese-tricks, mangoes, pepper shrimp, manish wata, june plum, hog plum, star apples, naseberry, sour sop, tamarind (or tambrin), bulla, cheese, bag juice, box juice, patty, salfish, curry chicken, fish, bammy, pigmented leave boiled crabs, etc. To date, I cannot think of a Jamaican meal she does not like to eat.
Her journey into the Jamaican Culture was about to take off. I recall at 10 months old, she and my brother would go mango picking, at 6:30am. She and he would be outside enjoying the morning air, even though she was barely walking, she made sure she kept her balance with one hand on the wall and the other hand hanging on to a black mango as she attempted to fill her tiny mouth with it. She would eat mangoes until she was in a drunken stooper and slept all day. What fun memories.
I am so proud of the experiences she had in Jamaica as a child,because now at age 13, she is more understanding of my culture and it is embedded in her. She loves everything about our culture. She talks about Jamaica often. She has fun memories of taking her bath in the zinc pan; hand washing her clothes (even though the washing machine was available); gathering water from the rain water that settles in the barrels; going on hikes, bathing in the river, to her sleepless nights enjoying Grand Market; night beach at Blue Fields, Westmoreland; YS Falls, Middle Quarter; Jack Sprats in Treasure Beach and her favorite Cloggy's Restaurant in Black River-where she gets to select her fish and have it fried with the most succulent steamed bammies., and of course the music because she loves to dance. No matter what the new dance is, she sees it once and that is it. I recall her spending the summer in Jamaica about 4-years ago, and went on a field trip where she entered a dance competition with other kids her age and won. She was elated, she said "mommy, I gave them all the dances I know even di Yankee one dem!" I laughed so hard her excitement made the fear of me not being there with her subside, not to mention my fear of her being on the road with those crazy drivers and small roads. But God has much in-store for her so I don't believe he's ready to take her from me yet, she has more lives to touch.
To be continued...
Sent from Christine's iPhone 4.
"Peace"
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